And you thought a three year old sneezing on you was bad enough...
So I'm changing this girl's nappy. I open it up and lo and behold! There's a whole lot of poo there - thick and almost camo green in colour. Trouble is, the wipes I have don't seem to be enough. I scrabble round for a fresh pack and am unable to open it due to the thick blue plastic gloves I'm wearing. 'I've got to get these off', I muse, 'as most fingers have probably been exposed to toddler poo I'll take a gamble with my pinky finger'. I carefully put my gloved right hand finger between my teeth and gently remove my glove. A split second later it hits me, a yeasty tang and the realisation that maybe that glove wasn't as clean as I'd hoped...
The thing with nappies is, you never know what you're getting. Take for instance the other day, I grabbed a girl to change her nappy, she was in good spirits but was a little pongy so I didnt expect much drama. Pulling off her tights I was in for a real shock, it was watery diarrhoea of the most noxious order. On her tights, jeans, up her back, on her feet. Everywhere. As I worked to clear up the mess a fuggy cloud enveloped me, but all I could do was start breathing through my mouth and carry on. I'll never forget finding a fragment of carrot on the nappy mat as I was clearing up afterwards.
When it comes to the adventures of pre-schooler digestion I think I've seen it all now...
A.
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