Monday 30 June 2014

'Make me fart like Stan's silver moon sparklings...'

Misheard from Sixpence None The Richer's 'Kiss Me' (it's in the chorus).

I mention it as the tune has been running through my head this weekend. E has it on CD.

Plus it bugs her when I mention it, a lovely jangly pop song ruined by my puerile sensibilities. And selective hearing of course...

Anyway, its lunchtime and I'm nursing my latte in the usual location. Nice to have some time off, the coursework has been submitted and there is no rush with the matched betting right now. I have four weeks to go at work and I'm realising I will miss the place. Well, the kids anyway.

I was helping a two and a half year old girl as she climbed the rope wall the other day. A dainty, poised little thing, lets call her Marty. Now Marty will have the world in her thrall when she's bigger. She's pretty, tall with killer eye-lashes already. However her poise left her momentarily as she climbed. M let out an extravagant, reverberating fart like a middle aged man motorboating one into a leather sofa. Stunned,  I asked Marty 'Was that you?'. She said not a word. I then said 'We say 'excuse me', dont we?'. Marty meekly said 'excuse me' to recover some of her dainty composure. 

When you're around little kids no day is the same. They can go from contentment to gut-wrenching torment in an instant. The highs are higher. The lows more stormy and intense. All you can do is hope to keep them somewhere in the middle. The irony is, by the time they've mastered that...they're off to school!!!!


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